Tuesday, 18 October 2016

Third Trimester Stress and Worries

Alexander has not long turned 27 months old and Lily is approaching her first ever half-term holiday and just lately I have felt so stressed out and wondering how will I ever cope with an additional baby in the house!

Alexander has been on/off poorly for a couple of weeks now, as have many of my friend's children. If its not one thing it is the other and as soon as he got over the cold which had me feeling like a zombie for a a good few days, he caught a cough with Rob had caught whilst at work (*shakes fists at Freshers!).

As a result he has been off his food which is not like him. Admittedly he has been putting away a hearty breakfast and has even pushed PB on toast aside in favour of Shreddies, or pancakes - but he then won't eat lunch or snacks at playgroups and barely eat his dinner. I know he is out of sorts and when he had a 3 hour nap I knew he was brewing some kind of lurgy. But he has been so incredibly clingy; waking up in an awful grump after a too short nap or skipping a nap altogether despite getting up earlier. At playgroups he is usually so independent but he won't let me sit down and wants to take me by the hand and lead me everywhere and be held.

Lily, despite having a glowing parent's evening, doesn't really listen to me in the afternoons and evenings. She is apparently such a helpful girl at school, I wish she'd continue that behaviour at home! By 6 pm I feel completely done but I know I have to continue to get them ready and into bed despite their protestations. Rob has been working such long days, but his experiments are going really well and he can't exactly press pause.

I feel like my late afternoons and evenings involve a lot more voice-raising and generally feeling rather stressed. I lose my patience and can't wait to just get them to bed and collapse with a hot drink. And yes it makes me feel really guilty and then I start wondering how on earth will I factor in the needs of a newborn if Alexander continues like this? Especially a fed on-demand baby which usually involves dropping everything to get comfy on the sofa again.

I'm over 30 weeks now and I'm sure that it is this stage of pregnancy when the realities of impending motherhood kicks in again.

Fingers crossed the balance will be restored again soon and I will feel like I've got more of a grip on things.

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